Special Edition: Review of an Unaired, Unseen Television Program

Any idiot can write a review of a television show he’s already seen.

This idiot, though, can write a review of one he hasn’t.

Tonight is the season debut of Saturday Night Live, and without seeing the show, without knowing who the host is, who the musical guest is (to be honest, The Curmudgeon only knows about fifty percent of the musical guests), and without knowing who’s gone from last year’s cast and who’s been added, The Curmudgeon can tell you what they’ll be saying around the water cooler on Monday morning – if, that is, they’re saying anything at all.

“Boy, that show’s gone downhill. It’s not funny anymore.”

“SNL hasn’t been funny since [fill in your favorite former cast member] left.”

“There’s not a single person on that show I know.”

“Why don’t they just cancel it already?”

“Oh, I didn’t even realize it was still on.”

Of course, if you ask most of these critics if they actually, you know, watched the show they’re talking about, or have watched it at all in recent years, they’re probably going to tell you they haven’t.

But that’s not going to stop them from lamenting the passing of the show’s golden years, “When SNL was great and every sketch was funny” – which, The Curmudgeon assures you, was never, ever true.



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