Monthly Archives: August 2016

Political Overkill

As attorney general of Pennsylvania, Kathleen Kane was probably overmatched almost from day one. She did numerous things that can best be described as stupid, but eventually she did things that can best be described as criminal and the law caught up to her: a jury recently found her guilty of nine criminal charges, including conspiracy, perjury, and obstruction of justice. She resigned her office and will be sentenced, presumably to jail, this fall.

Five people have been elected attorney general since Pennsylvania began choosing this official at the polls and Kane is the second of those five to go to jail, go directly to jail, to not pass go, and to not collect $200.

Kane is alone, though, in being the only one of the five elected attorneys general in Pennsylvania to be a Democrat. Republicans were not pleased about this – not pleased at all – so when her shenanigans in office seemed to go too far, they initiated impeachment proceedings.

An entirely reasonable response to an entirely ridiculous situation.

And now that Kane has been convicted and is no longer attorney general?

Republicans in the state’s House of Representatives intend to continue impeachment proceedings.

Because apparently Pennsylvania is in such good shape that the Republicans running the state’s legislature have nothing better to do with their time than to impeach a former elected official who no longer holds office and most likely will soon be heading to jail.

It is a case of massive political overkill.

Dr. Drew Pinsky is Still a Putz

More than four years ago The Curmudgeon conferred this title on the TV doctor based on his diagnosis of a patient he had never seen, never met, and never examined. Despite all those nevers, Dr. Drew was perfectly comfortable going on national television and telling his viewers about her emotional capacity for the rest of her life.

Dr. Drew was at it again last week, this time looking at a year-old, two-page medical report summarizing Hillary Clinton’s state of health. This is what he said on his radio show:

But the fact is she released her medical records some time ago, and if you listened to my show last week, I just called a friend of mine, Dr. Robert Huizenga, who’s an excellent internist-pulmonologist, and we just dispassionately sat and evaluated the medical record that she had released. And based on the information that she has provided and her doctors have provided, we were gravely concerned not just about her health, but her health care.

And then,

It just seems like she’s getting care from somebody that she met in Arkansas when she was a kid, and you’ve got to wonder. You’ve got to wonder. It’s not so much that her health is a grave concern. It’s that the care she’s getting could make it a concern.

So let us recap.

Pinsky never examined Hillary Clinton. He used as the basis of his “diagnosis” a two-page summary of Mrs. Clinton’s health status. The doctor who he suggested is someone Mrs. Clinton knew from her days in Arkansas, implying that her skills were never that good to begin with and probably outdated, is actually a director of internal medicine at Mount Sinai Health System in New York, attended college at the University of Pennsylvania, graduated from the New York University School of Medicine in 1990, served several residencies at the Cornell University Medical Center, and is board certified in internal medicine.

But Dr. Drew Pinsky, whose area of expertise is bamboozling deeply troubled people into share their problems and addictions on television for the entertainment of others and for his own enrichment and glorification, knows better.

Based on a two-page, year-old summary.

Of a patient he never examined.

Once again, Dr. Drew Pinsky it a putz.

Guns Don’t Kill; Stupid People Kill

After the terrorist attacks on New York City and Washington, D.C., many people thought airline pilots should be armed to fend off future terrorists – as if there’s any reason to believe airline pilots would be capable of doing such a thing.

Just because a guy wears a uniform doesn’t mean he’s ready to kill.

When cooler heads prevailed, a compromise was struck: pilots are not required to carry guns when they fly and they’re not necessarily encouraged to carry guns when they fly but they’re permitted to carry guns when they fly if their airline permits it, if they’ve graduated from a special program administered by the Federal Air Marshal Service, and if they’ve passed a psychological and background screening.

Unless, of course, they end up leaving their gun in the men’s room.

And forgetting it’s there.

And someone picks it up and runs off with it.

Which is exactly what happened in Philadelphia not too long ago: a Republic Airlines pilot (of course the guy with the gun flies for Republic Airlines, it wouldn’t be someone who worked for Democrat Airlines) was going through his pre-boarding routine of emptying his bladder – no doubt he dislikes airplane bathrooms as much as the rest of us – and put down a satchel with his gun to, um, take care of business.

And then left the rest room without it.   (After, presumably – although you never know with guys – washing his hands.)

Five minutes later, when Johnny realized he didn’t have his gun, he returned to the men’s room.

And of course the satchel, and the .40 caliber gun inside it, were gone.

An hour later airport security found the gun in a custodial closet, where the janitor who stole it stashed it for safe-keeping.

And didn’t use it to hijack a plane, rob a store, or use airport visitors for target practice.

That’s an hour later – an excellent job, by the way, Philadelphia International Airport police.

Go ahead, punk: complain that the pretzels are stale. I DARE you.

Not coincidentally, complaints about stale pretzels on his flights are down 96%.

But in that hour 16 flights were delayed, 2693 passengers were inconvenienced, and a whole lot of people were scared.

All so we can have the illusion that there’s someone there to protect us, sometimes, maybe, and so pilots can act like big tough guys and try to out-Sully Sully.

Maybe they need to rethink this pilots with guns thing.

Not a Clue

The Curmudgeon was browsing through the Salon web site recently when he came across the following headline:

Instagram’s new Snapchat-esque story feature is a win for fans of the long-distance like

Say what?

Say what?

And he has to admit: he has not a clue – not even a hint of a germ of a shred of a clue – of what any of that means.

Update on “Corruption”

Last week The Curmudgeon told you the tale of Philadelphia district attorney Seth Williams, who recently reported more than $160,000 worth of gifts he had received between 2010 and 2015. One day Williams woke up, realized that all of these gifts had somehow slipped his mind, and reported them, as elected officials are required, to the appropriate authorities. You can refresh your memory here.

Later, a published report stated that in at least some of the situations involved, Williams apparently had solicited the gifts.

It was all pretty appalling: an elected public prosecutor accepting gifts from people and companies that had business before his office.

Now, Williams has apologized.


Sort of.

First, as reported by the Philadelphia Inquirer,

Philadelphia District Attorney Seth Williams apologized to his staff Friday for any distractions created by the “adverse publicity” that has surrounded his disclosure of thousands of dollars in previously unreported gifts.

“I understand and recognize that each of you works very hard to represent the commonwealth with integrity and honor,” he wrote in an email obtained by the Inquirer and Daily News. “The adverse publicity about me during this past week has likely made it more difficult for you to do that. I deeply regret and apologize to you for that.”

But when you read about this apology you realize that Williams didn’t apologize for accepting the gifts, didn’t apologize for soliciting the gifts, and didn’t apologize for failing to report the gifts. No he essentially apologized for getting caught, and for his actions – and inactions – that cast aspersions on all of those who work for him.

The following Monday Williams apologized again, this time by email, to his political supporters. Again, as reported by the Philadelphia Inquirer:

“One of my requirements as an elected official is to fully disclose all gifts and or in-kind services I receive, even those from my closest friends and families,” Williams said in an email issued by his campaign. “I take full responsibility on failing to disclose what was required. We’ve taken the proper steps to make sure this doesn’t happen again and will be fully compliant moving forward.”

When you read this you see yet again that Williams didn’t apologize for accepting the gifts and didn’t apologize for soliciting the gifts. His only failure, he seems to believe, was not reporting them. He apparently sees nothing wrong with the gifts he received and his efforts to solicit those gifts.

It’s pretty disgusting.

The Trump Watch: Mid-August (part 2 of 2)

(continued from yesterday)

The Donald draws large crowds wherever you go – proof, The Curmudgeon believes, that you really can fool at least some of the people some of the time. But his penchant for exaggeration is unquenchable, as the Roanoke Times reported earlier this month:

[Trump] boasted there were 1,000 people standing outside on the Wells Avenue side in 104-degree heat, listening to him on loudspeakers. (There weren’t; there were at most 50, according to a city firefighter who was outside, and the temperature never hit 100.)

*            *            *

The Washington Post’s Dana Milbank reported in early August on Trump’s arms’ length relationship with the truth:

The Republican presidential nominee tweeted over the weekend that rival Hillary Clinton and her fellow Democrats “are trying to rig the debates” by scheduling them during NFL games. (In fact, the bipartisan debate commission, independent of parties and candidates, announced the dates on Sept. 23, 2015.)

In sharp contrast to those tiny, tiny hands.

In sharp contrast to those tiny, tiny hands.

He further alleged that “I got a letter from the NFL saying, ‘This is ridiculous.’ ” (The National Football League says it sent no such letter.)

 In an epic interview with ABC News’s George Stephanopoulos, Trump declared that Russia’s Vladimir Putin “is not going to go into Ukraine.” (Russia has been in Ukraine since 2014.)

 Trump further asserted that “I have no relationship with Putin,” “I never met him” and “I have never spoken to him on the phone.” (In 2013, he said that “I do have a relationship” with Putin, and in 2014 he said, “I spoke indirectly and directly with President Putin, who could not have been nicer.”)

 Trump announced that former New York mayor Michael Bloomberg, who criticized Trump during the Democratic National Convention, “doesn’t know me well.” (Trump, on CBS in January, said of Bloomberg: “I know him very well.”)

And this:

There isn’t space to mention most of Trump’s whoppers, so let’s take a simple category: those in which Trump debunks himself. He claimed that he never promised to raise $6 million for veterans, that he wanted to keep his fundraising for veterans quiet, that he never offered to pay legal fees for supporters who hit protesters, that he didn’t call Marco Rubio “Mark Zuckerberg’s personal senator,” that he doesn’t “know anything about David Duke,” that he “never mocked” a disabled reporter, that he opposed the Iraq invasion “loud and strong” from the start and that he didn’t support the attack on Libya.

In each case, video, audio and written evidence proves otherwise. So, too, do the facts refute his denials that he called Sen. John McCain a “loser,” objected to Fox News Channel host Megyn Kelly as a debate moderator and used a vulgar word to describe Sen. Ted Cruz at a campaign rally.

In each case, Trump surely could have known that a simple Internet search would prove him a liar. This suggests that he may not think he’s lying — and that he sees truth not as an absolute but as the last thing to come out of his mouth.

*            *            *

Of course, the really menschy thing to do would have been to say "No, that's extraordinarily kind of you, but the Purple Heart belongs to those who earned it the hard way."

Of course, the really menschy thing to do would have been to say “No, that’s extraordinarily kind of you, but the Purple Heart belongs to those of you who earned it the hard way.”

Congratulations to The Donald, by the way, for finally getting that Purple Heart he always wanted. The Curmudgeon is certain that all those soldiers who earned their Purple Hearts the old-fashioned way – by getting wounded in battle – are delighted that he’s joined their ranks.

*            *            *

When The Donald declared President Obama the founder of ISIS, The Curmudgeon – like many others – assumed he meant that Mr. Obama had contributed to an environment that fostered ISIS’s emergence. It may or may not be true but it’s a reasonable argument, even if the word “founder” is a bit much.

A day or two after Trump made this claim he went on a conservative radio talk show and the host offered him an opportunity to explain that he meant that Mr. Obama had not literally founded ISIS.

“I know what you meant – you meant that he created the vacuum, he lost the peace,” the host suggested.

Trump, though, was having none of it.

No, I meant that he’s the founder of ISIS, I do.

Of course in the following days he retreated from his hyperbole, but you have to wonder: since Trump is a guy who believes the U.S. should wield its nuclear arsenal more effectively, don’t you worry that he’s going to use one of those bombs and then, a few days later, realize that maybe he shouldn’t have?

*            *            *

As part of the fight against ISIS, Trump has “…called for parents, teachers and others to promote “American culture” and encouraged “assimilation.”

“Assimilation”? Didn’t we decide that it was okay to express pride in our origins? Also, how do you “assimilate” people who look different from the majority and how has that worked out so far for young black men whose backs seem to be magnets for police bullets?

*            *            *

Also in the fight against ISIS, Trump has, as reported by the Philadelphia Inquirer,

…vowed to partner with any country that shares his goal of defeating the extremist group, regardless of other strategic disagreements, and named Russia as a nation he would like to improve relations with.

Any country? Really? Has he lost his mind? This is pretty consistent with Trump’s approach to business: you can be a competitor or an enemy but if he has an opportunity to make money with you, you are suddenly his friend and all past disagreements and transgressions are forgotten. There are still a lot of totalitarian governments and dictatorships out there, but this “Trump Doctrine” would make them allies.

Not a good idea.

*            *            *

Trump recently tweeted

If the disgusting and corrupt media covered me honestly and didn’t put false meaning into the words I say, I would be beating Hillary by 20%.

The only one putting meaning into Trump’s words is Trump. Every time he opens his mouth he puts his foot into it. If he wants the press to pay more attention to the substance of what he’s saying he has to do two things: first, say something of substance; and second, stop saying things that become major distractions. The only person he has to blame for that is himself. When he gets “credit” for stopping his assault on the father of a Muslim-American killed in battle, you know the campaign has come off the rails.

*            *            *

And it’s not just the press saying the campaign has come off the rails: professional Republicans are saying it, too. The Philadelphia Inquirer reports that

As he skips from one gaffe to the next, GOP leaders in Washington and in the most competitive states have begun openly contemplating turning their backs on their party’s presidential nominee to prevent what they fear will be wide-scale Republican losses on Election Day.


Republicans who have devoted their professional lives to electing GOP candidates say they believe the White House already may be lost. They’re exasperated by Trump’s divisive politics and his insistence on running a general election campaign that mirrors his approach to the primaries.

 Based on his campaign record, there’s no chance he’s going to win,” said Sara Fagen, the political director for former President George W. Bush. “He’s losing groups of people he can’t get back.

And Trump’s not rising to the challenge.

… in the past seven days, Trump has questioned the advice of senior aides, threatened to stop raising money for the party, dismissed the usefulness of get-out-the-vote efforts and defended his decision not to run any television ads even as his opponents fill the airwaves with spots backing Clinton in several contested states.

And this brilliant observation from the candidate himself:

I’ll just keep doing the same thing I’m doing right now,” he told CNBC on Thursday. “And at the end it’s either going to work or I’m going to you know, I’m going to have a very, very nice, long vacation.”

The result?

More than 100 GOP officials, including at least six former members of Congress and more than 20 former staffers at the Republican National Committee, have signed a letter asking the party chairman, Reince Priebus, to stop helping Trump’s campaign.

*            *            *

And we’re still waiting for those income tax returns. As a reminder, Trump says he “can’t” release those returns while they’re being audited. That’s not true, on two counts: first, not all of his returns are being audited, so there are some that aren’t being contested and can be released; and second, there’s no rule or law that says he can’t release those being audited. It’s not that he can’t; it’s that he won’t.

Has he even filed?

Maybe they’re in a drawer with the Obama birth certificate.

Most likely because he’s in the real estate business, which may offer more opportunities for dodging taxes than any other field, and he desperately doesn’t want voters to see that he barely pays any taxes at all.

Unlike those of us whose votes he seeks and whose interests he says he’ll serve.

Do you find it even remotely possible to imagine Trump serving anyone’s interests but his own under any – any – circumstances?

The Trump Watch: Mid-August (part 1 of 2)

The Curmudgeon continues to follow the ridiculous Trump campaign, trying, whenever he can, to wander off the beaten-to-death track.

*            *            *

Two important states in the upcoming election are Pennsylvania and Ohio. The vote may be close, and both candidates need those states. The Trump campaign knows this and is going after what it considers an important swing vote in both states: the Amish.

Because Trump's all about family values, right?

Because Trump’s all about family values, right?

Yes, the Amish.

The Trump campaign plans to target the Amish with billboards and maybe some other campaign tools. Social media won’t cut it with this group: you’re not going to catch an Amish guy buried in his smartphone while checking his Facebook page and Twitter feeds while steering his horse and buggy on the back roads of Lancaster County, Pennsylvania (and yes, if you go Lancaster, you really do see those horses and buggies all the time).

You have to wonder what the Trump folks are thinking: yes, Ohio and Pennsylvania are important states and every vote counts, but there are only about 250,000 Amish people in the entire country and only about 70,000 in both Pennsylvania and Ohio. Most, though, don’t register to vote: in Lancaster County, the place with the most Amish in Pennsylvania, there are only an estimated 2500 Amish people registered to vote. The Trump people must be counting on a very, very close race.

Recent polls suggest that may be wishful thinking.

*            *            *

Trump made his big pitch to black voters and it consisted of these magical words:

What do you have to lose by trying something new like Trump? What do you have to lose?

Golden, huh? Talk about your compelling arguments.

He also riddled his remarks with bad information, saying “you live in poverty” when blacks live in poverty at no higher a rate than some other minority groups; saying black youth unemployment is 58 percent, which it only is if you include high school students among those unemployed (and in which case the white unemployment rate is 50 percent); and insisting that if they elected him president they would be so happy with his performance that he would win 95 percent of the black vote in four years (even though he currently polls at only two percent and Barack Obama’s high was 93 percent in 2012).

So you have to hand it to The Donald: the guy can sure tell a tall tale.

The BBC offered the testimony of two people who attended one of Trump’s recent speeches to black audiences:

“This is Trump’s SALES PITCH to black voters, ostensibly. Telling us we’re dumb, broke suckers who have no jobs is the best he could do,” Jamil Smith, a black reporter for MTV News, wrote on Twitter.

Ana Navarro, a Latina Republican strategist, wrote: “Trump’s ‘Black outreach’ so tone-deaf & condescending, his ‘Hispanic outreach’, (eating a taco bowl), suddenly not that bad & stupid.”

This was quite a turnabout for a guy who, just a month earlier, turned down an invitation to address an NAACP convention. Maybe a guy who boasts of his great “relationships with the blacks” doesn’t think he needs to make a special trip just to talk to “the blacks.” Or maybe he just wants to avoid being asked to explain this statement he made on television in 1989:

A well-educated black has a tremendous advantage over a well-educated white in terms of the job market. And, I think, sometimes a black may think that they don’t really have the advantage or this or that but in actuality today, currently, it’s, uh, it’s a, it’s a great. I’ve said on occasion, even about myself, if I were starting off today I would love to be a well-educated black because I really believe they do have an actual advantage today.

*            *            *

One of the many stars Trump inspired to come to his convention.

One of the many stars Trump inspired to come to his convention.

In a past post listing the “big stars” Donald Trump attracted to speak at the Republican convention The Curmudgeon unintentionally omitted one: Willie Robertson, a member of the television Duck Dynasty family. In 2014 the Robertson family captured a new kind of national attention when Willie’s father, Phil, told GQ magazine:

It seems like, to me, a vagina – as a man – would be more desirable than a man’s anus. That’s just me. I’m just thinking: There’s more there! She’s got more to offer. I mean, come on, dudes! You know what I’m saying? But hey, sin: It’s not logical, my man. It’s just not logical.

*            *            *

Presidents are typically big readers. JFK was a big reader, Bill Clinton and Barack Obama are voracious readers, even George W. Bush had a contest with some of his staff members to see who could read more books. His father was a big reader, as were Richard Nixon and Jimmy Carter.

Donald Trump is not much of a reader.

Does that surprise you?

Consider this, from the Washington Post:

As he has prepared to be named the Republican nominee for president, Donald Trump has not read any biographies of presidents. He said he would like to someday.

 He has no time to read, he said: “I never have. I’m always busy doing a lot. Now I’m more busy, I guess, than ever before.”

Trump’s desk is piled high with magazines, nearly all of them with himself on their covers, and each morning, he reviews a pile of printouts of news articles about himself that his secretary delivers to his desk. But there are no shelves of books in his office, no computer on his desk.

Trump figures that any magazine smart enough to put him on the cover is worth studying for ideas on how to run the country.

Trump figures that any magazine smart enough to put him on the cover is worth studying for ideas on how to run the country.

Hmmm, magazines with Trump on the cover: since when is People preparation for the presidency?

The Post continues:

He said in a series of interviews that he does not need to read extensively because he reaches the right decisions “with very little knowledge other than the knowledge I [already] had, plus the words ‘common sense,’ because I have a lot of common sense and I have a lot of business ability.”

Just what America needs: a president making important decisions “with very little knowledge…”

At the heart of this approach is Trump’s belief that experts – the people whose work some folks might find useful – have anything of value to offer:

Trump said he is skeptical of experts because “they can’t see the forest for the trees.” He believes that when he makes decisions, people see that he instinctively knows the right thing to do: “A lot of people said, ‘Man, he was more accurate than guys who have studied it all the time.’

And just like with presidential candidates’ fingers, length matters to Trump:

Trump said reading long documents is a waste of time because he absorbs the gist of an issue very quickly. “I’m a very efficient guy,” he said. “Now, I could also do it verbally, which is fine. I’d always rather have — I want it short. There’s no reason to do hundreds of pages because I know exactly what it is.”

Even when Trump doesn’t read, moreover, he often has opinions about things that have been written – especially about him. As the Post explains,

Trump has no shortage of strong opinions even about books he has not read. He told the Washington Post that he has not read four biographies written about him, yet he called three of the authors of those books “lowlifes,” and he sued one of them for libel.

*            *            *

As The Curmudgeon has written in the past, the idea of serious vote fraud in this country is a myth perpetuated by people on the losing side of election results. As a former employer of The Curmudgeon once observed, “To the losers, elections are never lost. They’re stolen.”

The Donald is the latest in a long line of people pursuing this line of argument, but interestingly, he’s pursuing it preemptively as his chances of winning wane. Now, he maintains, if he loses it can only – only – be because the election was rigged. Of course, Trump’s idea of a rigged vote is any vote not cast in his favor.

*            *            *

Surely Trump didn’t serious suggest that the Russians hack American computers in search of Hillary Clinton’s lost emails.

Surely he didn’t.


He did.


*            *            *

Like a lover, The Donald can be fickle. Once upon a time, for example, he loved Michael Bloomberg.

Really loved him.

In 2012, he tweeted

Mike Bloomberg is doing a great job as Mayor of New York City. Ray Kelly is a great Police Commissioner.

And this:

At very end of @MikeBloomberg  term, A@realDonaldTrump: “You have been a great Mayor…I mean this guy is FANTASTIC”

But when Bloomberg endorsed Hillary Clinton, the singer changed his tune:

“Little” Michael Bloomberg, who never had the guts to run for president, knows nothing about me. His last term as Mayor was a disaster!

And of course there were his convention-week remarks, clearly about Bloomberg:

“I was going to hit one guy in particular, a very little guy,” Trump said, making a clear reference to Bloomberg’s stature. “I was going to hit this guy so hard his head would spin and he wouldn’t know what the hell happened. He came out of nowhere!”

Hell hath no fury like a candidate scorned.

Or The Donald scorned.

(more tomorrow)

An Olympic Observation: Ryan Lochte

By now you’re familiar with the national joke that is Ryan Lochte. In case you missed it, Lochte was the ringleader among four Olympic swimmers who got drunk, trashed a gas station bathroom, and when caught by security guards, fabricated a story about being held up at gunpoint by police.

When a 32-year-old guy dies his hair white just for the attention it's hardly surprising that further immature behavior is in his future.

When a 32-year-old guy dies his hair white just for the attention it’s hardly surprising that further immature behavior is in his future.

Lochte is no newcomer to the public eye. The guy is 32 years old, so he’s not a kid, and on the strength of his success at the Olympics four years ago was the star of the reality television series What Would Ryan Lochte Do? The show, alas, was cancelled even before all of the episodes aired because it failed to measure up even to the lower-than-low standards of the E Entertainment network.

While promoting his series Lochte did an interview with the morning news program of a Fox television affiliate in Philadelphia and the result was pretty damn funny. See it here. (The whole thing is pretty entertaining in a non-entertaining way but the real fun begins at about the 4:55 mark.)

An Olympic Observation: Synchronized Swimming

Have you watched any of the Olympic synchronized swimming? If you have, have you found yourself wondering “Why on earth is this an Olympic sport?”



There’s a better way to enjoy synchronized swimming: check out this 1980s Saturday Night Live sketch and this fifth grade talent show. Their interpretation of synchronized swimming is far more entertaining than anything you’ll see in Rio.


An Olympic Observation: Make-up

The fair and balanced folks at Fox News have a program called Sports Court, which is ostensibly a place where a host and guest experts discuss and debate issues involving sports and law. The Curmudgeon says “ostensibly” not because of his reservations about anything involving Fox News but because he spent several minutes on the site without finding a general description of what the program is really all about.

Anyhow, in an apparent digression from the intersection of sports and law, the program recently delved into sports and popular culture with a six-minute discussion about make-up worn, and make-up not worn, by female Olympic athletes. Joining host Tamara Holder were two “experts”:   Bo Dietl, a former New York City police detective, and radio personality Mark Simone. There was never any discussion about what expertise Dietl and Simone brought to the conversation – and never any sign of such expertise as the conversation unfolded.

In arguing for Olympic athletes to pay more attention to their appearance, Simone explained that

The whole point of the Olympics, the whole reason for this training, for this work to get there, is product endorsements.

And he said that with a straight face. Honest.

Not to be outdone, Dietl declared that

I think when you see an athlete, why should I have to look at some chick’s zits…? Why not a little blush on her lips and cover those zits. I like to see a person win that gold medal and go up there and look beautiful.

Because for Dietl, gymnastics – or swimming or diving or field hockey or basketball – is apparently little more than the talent portion of a beauty contest.

And Dietl had a similar observation about the program’s host:

Tamara, look how beautiful you are with that makeup,” the former detective exclaimed. “What do you look like when you crawl out of bed in the morning? I’d rather have you now, the way you look. You look beautiful, and I think it just enhances the beauty of that athlete.

"Ewwwww," she's thinking.

“Ewwwww,” she’s thinking.

The promotional photo for this episode of Sports Court features the three participants, with Dietl’s arm around Holder’s shoulder and a look on Holder’s face that suggested she was looking forward to taking a long, loooooooong shower.

Or maybe a flea dip.

View the entire conversation here – the best stuff is in the first minute, although there’s more, if you’re interested.

But don’t do it after eating because you may lose your lunch.