Three Formulas for Looking Like a Dick

Formula Number 1:

Put on a business suit. The better the suit, the stronger the effect.

A dick

Go to an area, like a central business district, where there are lots of people walking around.

Walk while talking with your phone up to your ear.

Congratulations: you look like a complete dick.

Formula Number 2:

Go into a store.

Go to the checkout to pay for something.

Talk on your phone while the cashier is ringing you up.

Congratulations, you look like a complete dick.

Formula Number 3:

Her too!

Walk around talking while you have one of those little bluetooth gizmos attached to your head.

Congratulations: you look like a complete dick.

Author: foureyedcurmudgeon

The Four-Eyed Curmudgeon is a middle-aged male who is everything right-wing America despises: he is a big-city, ivy league-educated, liberal Jew. He currently resides in a suburb of Philadelphia. He chooses anonymity for the time being because this is his first experience blogging and he wants to get comfortable with it, and see if he likes it, before he exposes himself (figuratively speaking, of course) to the world.

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