Tag Archives: philadelphia 76ers tanking

Time to Invoke the Mercy Rule?

In many baseball little leagues they have what they call a “mercy rule,” which says that if a team falls behind its opponent by a large number of runs – usually, ten or eleven runs – the game is ended to spare the children on the losing team any further humiliation.

Well, the National Basketball Association season started just three weeks ago, the Philadelphia 76ers have played ten games, and the Philadelphia 76ers have lost ten games.

They lost one of those games by 53 points.

Another by 32 points.

Another by 26 points.

Another by 25 points.

And another by18 points.

All told, they’ve lost their ten games by a combined total of 185 points, or an average margin of 18.5 points a game. (As you can see, The Curmudgeon is quite proficient in higher math.)

76ers tankingOf course, as The Curmudgeon has written in the past, all of this losing is by design: the 76ers have assembled the worst team they possibly can so they can lose as many games as they can and “earn,” if that’s what you want to call it, the right to select the best player coming out of college basketball. The process of doing this is known as “tanking.”

The 76ers have played ten games and the only victories they’ve won are moral victories that come when they leave the court not in a state of utter humiliation. The players are demoralized, the fans are demoralized, the news media is demoralized, and it’s gotten so bad that the mother of one of the team’s players took to Twitter to refer to the 76ers as a “screwed up program” and to declare – please excuse both the profane and lousy English, readers – that

hi im kj mcdaniels mom , yes they are tanking the season fucking over my son and yes I and kj fans are livid

Under these circumstances, don’t you think it might be appropriate for the National Basketball Association to invoke the mercy rule and just send the Philadelphia 76ers home not just for the day but for the rest of the season and put everyone out of their misery right now?


Don’t Give Them Any Ideas

The Utah Jazz basketball team announced that it has signed a five-year-old boy with leukemia who is a big fan of their team to a one-day player contract.

This was truly a lovely gesture by the team, but The Curmudgeon worries that it’s going to put ideas into the heads of the people who run the Philadelphia 76ers. For the second consecutive year, the 76ers plan to field a team that’s so profoundly bad that it will lose most of its games, thereby entitling the team to the pick of the litter of the best players coming out of college basketball next year.

Can you picture a starting lineup inspired by the Jazz’s wonderful idea?