Tag Archives: Rick Santorum

Once a Santorum, Always a Santorum

You’d think that once a guy managed the considerable feat of losing what should have been a safe, lifetime sinecure in the U.S. Senate and then making a quixotic, never-had-a-chance bid to get elected president he’d have the good sense to gracefully disappear from public life.

But if the guy is Rick Santorum, you’d think wrong.

Santorum was back this week, and in a bizarre twist of logic and hyperbole he somehow managed to equate Republicans’ fight against Obamacare with Nelson Mandela’s life-long struggles against apartheid.  See a clip of Santorum reminding us why we disliked him so.

(And while you’re at it, notice how Bill O’Reilly manages to attack Nelson Mandela, before the body is even warm, while insisting that despite his differences with Mandela he’d never, ever attack such a great man.)

Santorum and Ted Cruz: The Pot Calling the Kettle Black

Like a case of herpes, every time we think Rick Santorum has finally disappeared, this cold sore on the butt of the American people re-erupts.

This time Santorum is seeking to claim another fifteen minutes of fame by criticizing Texas senator Ted Cruz and the role Cruz played in the unnecessary shutdown of the federal government.  The precise quote was “I would say that in the end he did more harm,” … “I think it was not his objective.  I think his objective was a laudable one.”

That’s just so special coming from Santorum because he did the same thing in the 2012 Republican presidential primaries.  His performance during those months forced all of the Republican candidates to push further to the right than they naturally were, further to the right than they wanted to be, and further to the right than the people whose votes they were seeking.  Those candidates never recovered from that disastrous right-ward shift and neither has their party, which essentially told the millions of Americans who sit on the fence, unaligned with any political party and willing to make their decisions on individual races based on the qualities of the candidates, that Republicans were no longer interested in their votes.  It was all Santorum’s fault, and now, he’s criticizing his political doppelganger for doing the very same thing.

It’s so…so…so very Santorum.

Mini-Rumination: Rick Santorum: The Gift That Keeps on Giving

Will Bunch of the Philadelphia Daily News had a great blog entry last week about professional straight man Rick Santorum.  According to the Rick, Penn State University, located in the Alabama-like part of Pennsylvania, is a “liberal icon” and his liberal Penn State professors gave him lower grades than he deserved because they disagreed with his conservative viewpoints.

Like Mr. Bunch, The Curmudgeon is skeptical.  Maybe it’s a case of revisionist history; maybe the guy’s delusional; and maybe it’s the kind of warped thinking that comes after four years of not getting any (Santorum doesn’t believe in sex except when trying to make babies and his youngest was born in 2008).

Mr. Bunch’s blog entry is worth two minutes of your time; read it here.

Mini-Rumination: Deciphering Rick Santorum

Trying to understand how someone’s mind works can be a fool’s game, but The Curmudgeon relishes a challenge.

And he thinks he’s had a revelation about Rick Santorum.

Like most conservatives, Mr. Santorum wants the government out of people’s lives.  Fair enough.

On the other hand, he opposes abortion.

He opposes prenatal testing becauses he fears it leads to abortion.

He opposes birth control.

He opposes pre-marital sex.

He opposes non-marital sex.

He opposes non-procreative sex, even in a committed, monogamous marriage.

He opposes homosexuality.

He opposes gay marriage.

It’s suddenly clear: Santorum wants the government out of our lives so there’ll be room for the Catholic Church to take over our lives.

And the approximately 225 million Americans who aren’t Catholic?

The Curmudgeon guesses that’s just too bad for them.

Mini-Rumination: Santorum=McGovern

Rick Santorum=George McGovern.

Really.

Look at how many times Democrats managed to nominate presidential candidates who had virtually no chance of winning the general election.  What was the secret to their non-success?  They held primaries with multiple candidates who distinguished themselves by moving to the left.  Sure, it helped those candidates win the nomination, but it also killed any chance they had to win in November.

Think about it.

George McGovern:  waaaaaay too liberal.

Walter Mondale:  too liberal.

Michael Dukakis:  too liberal.

John Kerry:  too liberal.

The Curmudgeon would argue that Jimmy Carter was too liberal, too, but that the public was so fed up with Republicans in the years immediately following Watergate that almost any Democrat with a pulse would have gotten elected.

Republicans learned their lesson in 1964 when they nominated Barry Goldwater, a guy so far out of the mainstream that he literally scared people.  Even Ronald Reagan, revered by Republicans today, wasn’t extremely conservative, nor were the Bushes.  Bob Dole and John McCain were mainstream Republicans who fought off more conservative challengers.

Normally, Republicans do things the smart, pragmatic way, but they’re on the verge of joining Democrats in the pantheon of stupid politics with their current infatuation with Rick Santorum.  Santorum is just like McGovern, Mondale, Dukakis, and Kerry:  a guy who is pursuing the nomination by appealing to the extreme element in his party and who is being embraced by that extreme element without regard to his electability when he has to stand for election before, you know, real people and real Americans and not just the lunatic fringe.

The Curmudgeon suspects that Republicans will eventually come to their senses and dismiss Santorum just as they dismissed the other flavors of the week during this campaign:  Sarah Palin, Herman Cain, Rick Perry, Michele Bachman, Newt Gingrich, Tim Pawlenty, Chris Christie, and Mitch Daniels.

If they don’t, they will be committing the equivalent of Democrats nominating George McGovern in 1972:  political suicide.

Mini-Rumination: Rick Santorum’s Daughter

It’s wonderful for Rick Santorum that he and his wife can afford to bundle their sick little three-year-old onto an airplane and take her to an outstanding hospital that’s nowhere near where they live so she can get the best medical care available.  The Curmudgeon’s thoughts are with the Santorums and he hopes little Bella does well.

At the same time, though, The Curmudgeon can’t help but hope that maybe this will lead Mr. Santorum to look a little more kindly on ordinary working people who can’t afford health insurance and who aren’t looking for the best care money can buy even though it’s a plane ride away but only want to be able to take their children to a neighborhood family doctor without breaking into their food or rent money.  As it stands now, Mr. Santorum’s outlook toward access to health care is pretty simple:  if you don’t have the money and you don’t have the insurance, that’s too damn bad.

Mini-Rumination: Hey There, Georgy Girl

Remember “Georgy Girl”?  There was the movie, with Lynn Redgrave and James Mason, about a dowdy woman who through a very circuitous path ends up marrying her parents’ wealthy and much older employer (ewwww) and raising a baby.  More memorable than the movie, at least to The Curmudgeon, was the song – a great tune and memorable lyrics that began:

Hey there, Georgy girl
Swingin’ down the street so fancy-free
Nobody you meet could ever see the loneliness there – inside you
Hey there, Georgy girl
Why do all the boys just pass you by?
Could it be you just don’t try or is it the clothes you wear?

You’re always window shopping but never stopping to buy
So shed those dowdy feathers and fly – a little bit

As 2011 draws to a close, Republican voters are reminding The Curmudgeon of Georgy Girl:  they’re always window-shopping but never stopping to buy.  Trying desperately not to concede the inevitability of attending the 2012 big dance in a Mitt Romney design, at various times this year they’ve peered into the window to check out Sarah Palin, Haley Barbour, Mitch Daniels, Ricky Santorum (still the subject of one of the best sites on the web), Michele Bachman, Tim Pawlenty, Herman Cain, Ron Paul (actually, everyone tries this one on but no one seriously considers wearing it), Rick Perry (remember Rick Perry?  It seems so…long ago), Jon Huntsman, and Chris Christie and ultimately found them all wanting in one way or another.  Right now, some of them are pretending they want to try on Newt Gingrich, but that’s pretty clearly a brave attempt at self-delusion that either will fade when people come to their senses or explode when Gingrich reverts to form and does something characteristically stupid.  (For fun reading, see this Mother Jones feature entitled “13 Reasons Why Newt Will Never Be the GOP Nominee”).

In the end, Georgy got what she wanted – or at least what she thought she wanted.  Republican voters may enjoy a similar happy ending – but first, they’re going to have to figure out what they want.